At 23 the blue sky above was a slate on which I would scribble my dreams and post my endless desires. Ambition was only a milestone beyond the infinite when passion provided the fuel. Caution simply didn’t exist.
At 33 it is time to take a stock and start yet again. Life may have changed, dreams haven’t. Energy may have dwindled passion hasn’t. Desires have reshaped themselves. Caution is now an acquaintance. I may no longer be young but I have redefined youth. I am raring to go, to master and to live a life the way I want it to be.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Happiness
After reading the few posts on my blog many of my friends expectedly asked me if there was anything troubling me and why I sounded so gloomy and morose. I wasn’t sad but was still searching for happiness, I answered trying to sound clever. But inevitably it set me thinking and question this persistent quest for happiness. Two bundles of joy, a caring wife, a loving family and many supportive friends should have ended or at least suspended it for some time. Yet my search went on.
When I rummaged the closet of my memories I found many a faded moments neatly tucked into a corner. Happiness isn’t eternal is what I always believed and yet the smallest of these moments were forever, everlasting. The first bite of the frozen ice cream which my grandfather bought for me many years ago, the camaraderie I shared with friends after sharing the stolen apples, the smell of the new clothes that I wore on the day of eid, the first day of the summer holidays, the irrepressible energy when I cheered for my favourite team, the innumerable cups of tea with the first taste of freedom in college, hiding my excitement in the semi dark theatre while holding her hand, the first glimpse of the boundless ocean and looking at the miniscule world below from the mountain peak, opening the envelope with my name that would open the doors to the real world, the pat on the back after that tiring night at work, the unbridled joy when she said yes, waking up to a listless sunday morning, and weaving those few dreams together, weighing a few pounds lesser, touching the tiny fingers and becoming a kid again, buying her an ice cream to see the glint in her eyes.
And yet my search continues….
When I rummaged the closet of my memories I found many a faded moments neatly tucked into a corner. Happiness isn’t eternal is what I always believed and yet the smallest of these moments were forever, everlasting. The first bite of the frozen ice cream which my grandfather bought for me many years ago, the camaraderie I shared with friends after sharing the stolen apples, the smell of the new clothes that I wore on the day of eid, the first day of the summer holidays, the irrepressible energy when I cheered for my favourite team, the innumerable cups of tea with the first taste of freedom in college, hiding my excitement in the semi dark theatre while holding her hand, the first glimpse of the boundless ocean and looking at the miniscule world below from the mountain peak, opening the envelope with my name that would open the doors to the real world, the pat on the back after that tiring night at work, the unbridled joy when she said yes, waking up to a listless sunday morning, and weaving those few dreams together, weighing a few pounds lesser, touching the tiny fingers and becoming a kid again, buying her an ice cream to see the glint in her eyes.
And yet my search continues….
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